I think I’ve got the blues. I wouldn’t say I’m depressed, I’m just sad. And lonely. And down in the dumps. And those feelings compounded by the holidays and the pressure and being recently dumped are making me sad. Not full on depression sad, but just gloomy.
My family, friends and co-workers have noticed too. They can see something is wrong. I’m not my usual self. I’m feeling despondent. Miserable. Empty.
I don’t know how to deal with these feelings. I’m nearly always in a good mood. Happy-go-lucky. I don’t know how to do depressed.
I miss him. The nights are the worst. When you’re alone in the dark with your thoughts. There’s too much time to think. To let the mind wander. To wish for things you can’t have; you shouldn’t want. But you do. So very badly.
I don’t begrudge anyone their happiness. But the part of me that is selfish wants it too. Perhaps the wanting is what causing me to have to wait. I don’t know.
tl;dr: I’m sad. It’s the holidays and that makes the sadness magnified by a thousand.
Runnin' Down a Dream 