An Apathetic Bride

Warning, this post is all about my upcoming destination wedding and my extreme disappointment with some of those closest to me.

I don’t think my big brother is going to come to my wedding. He’s my only sibling and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t seriously hurt by it. He said it is too expensive and he would have rather that I had the wedding in Buffalo (where we were first going to have it) because he could swing that trip with the whole family. But this is too expensive. I found out from my mom that he has enough money to buy himself a new SUV though! (He already has a truck for himself and another SUV for his wife). I was seething. But what can you do?

My two bff’s (who are my matron’s of honor) haven’t booked their wedding trips yet either. One cites money concerns–even though she only has to put down $200 with the travel agent, and the other is trying to get pregnant and isn’t sure if she can even come now. They’ve been trying to get pregnant for YEARS with no luck–they’ve only been able to do so once and lost the baby before 3 months. They are trying IUI this month and have enough funds to do it for another two months. Because the wedding is 6.5 months away, she won’t even buy a dress. (Which they are discontinuing the style she likes in the color I want, sigh). I understand that this is more important to her, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less.

We had a come-to-Jesus about the fact that I feel like both besties (who I’ve been bff’s with since we were 5 and 8 years old) are making me feel like my wedding doesn’t matter to them and that I am asking too much of them. The one who is trying to get pregnant said she’s sorry that I feel that way. I  HATE that phrase–it is a cop-out for actually apologizing. She’s not sorry for making me feel like they don’t care, just that I feel that way.

I would NEVER tell her not to try to get pregnant because I know they want children, but when you tell someone that you will be in their wedding and now you might not go and the bride has other friends who have already booked and were disappointed to NOT be in the wedding, it makes a girl just want to tell that friend to forget it and ask someone else. 

I think I put too much faith in people not to disappoint me. Even our family and life-long friends will show their true colors when it comes down to it, I guess.