Conversations with a co-worker

Her: “Ooo! Did you ever meet {Redacted}? 

Me: "Yes. When ex-boyfriend and I at the time stayed at his and his wife’s house on our way to Colorado.”

Her: “Well! He and his wife are divorced! You should totally go out with him! He’s a lawyer and you like divorced guys!”

Me: ………. “Um. Well, I don’t LIKE divorced guys in specific. It just seems that I have dated a few.” (quick count: 3)

Her: “Well, you like Lawyers.” (Ex Man Friend is a lawyer).

Me: “So apparently I liked divorced men who are lawyers?”

Her: “YES!”

Me: “Why are they getting divorced?”

Her: “Oh, they cheated on each other.”

Me: ……“yeah, I don’t think so. But thanks though.”

Her: “He’s tall though! And cute!”

Me: “But he cheats! What makes you think he won’t cheat on me?”

Her: “Oh yeah. Didn’t think of that.”

Me: ………. Walks away.

I just can’t even. This is my life.